Category: suffering

Nov 13

Are You Good Enough to be Healed?

 

Illness helps you sort out who your real friends are. Often people you never realized cared for you step up and provide incredible support. And then there are those on whom you counted but they fail to come through for you.

My friend Kristie expected to get some words of healing and blessing when she went to talk to her pastor shortly after a diagnosis of breast cancer sent her reeling just before her 40th birthday.

She didn’t get either.

“There was no comfort from him,” Kristie recalls more than 25 years later. “He told me ‘You deserved this. You’ve done something wrong, something bad and this is God’s way of showing you that.’ He was adamant about it. ”

Obviously, Kristie went looking for encouragement in other places after that conversation!

Sadly, I have talked to many people over the years who thought—or at least wondered if—their diagnosis was indeed a punishment from God. Usually there was something they did—or failed to do—and the thought the diagnosis might be God’s response to that wrongdoing.

While I have no doubt that illness can get our attention and even spur folks on to change their wayward ways, I don’t believe God is in the business of zapping people with serious illness to get them to shape up. If doing something wrong or “bad” led to cancer, everyone in the world would be needing to make an appointment with an oncologist!

Even in Jesus’ time people were tempted to always equate sickness with sin. Jesus disciples once asked him: “Why was this man born blind? Was it because of his own sins or his parents?”

Jesus’ reply was clear: “It was not because of his sins or his parents’ sins…This happened so the power of God could be seen in him.” (John 9:2,3)

So I remind you today, neither you or your loved one is facing a serious illness because you ­weren’t good enough. And you don’t need to do something ­special to earn or deserve healing from God. Don’t try to ­bargain with Him by being an especially good person, ­hoping He will reach down and heal. There’s nothing you can do to make God love you any more—or any less—than He already does. He proved that a long time ago:

This is real love. It is not that we loved God,
but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. 1 John 4:10

This is the way pastor-author Max Lucado describes it in his book In the Grip of Grace:
“You wonder how long my love will last? Find your answer on a splintered cross, on a craggy hill.
That’s me you see up there, your maker, your God, nail-stabbed and bleeding.
Covered in spit and sin-soaked. “That’s your sin I’m feeling. That’s your death I’m dying.
That’s your resurrection I’m living. That’s how much I love you.”

So if you’re still searching for an answer to the “why” question regarding your or your loved one’s illness… maybe, just maybe, it has happened so that the power of an incredibly loving God can be seen in you.

Be sure to open this blog in your browser so you don’t miss the beautiful song below by Chris Tomlin.

Oct 30

Yes, Your Suspicions Are True

 

I know many of you have suspected this about me for quite some time. Certainly my husband has. But now it’s confirmed in black-and-white.

I have a screw loose.

In the interest of full disclosure, I must tell you that this is not an x-ray of my loose screw. There wasn’t time to get a copy of my x-ray for this blog, so I did what any resourceful writer does…googled  “loose screw” and voilà!

My loose screw is in my left wrist, which I broke a year ago requiring surgery and the implantation of a stainless steel T-shaped plate and four screws for the distal radius break. And my screw is not as loose as this floating one–it’s just wriggled up a little too high, causing a lot of pain.

Actually by the time you’re reading this, I probably won’t have a loose screw anymore. Surgery to remove all the hardware is scheduled for the morning of Oct. 30. Therapy with a certified hand therapist begins a few days later and continues twice weekly for six weeks. Did I mention that I ALREADY did twice-weekly therapy for more than five months and daily wrist exercises for 11 months?!

If I’m being honest, I must tell you that I wish I could turn back the clock to Oct. 23, 2018, and not miss a step on our deck. And not fall forward onto the concrete. And not have a nerve injury which without medication causes terrible, burning pain. And certainly not have a screw loose.

How about you? Do you wish you could turn back the clock?

To the time before you heard the diagnosis. To the day before the accident.  To the happier years of your marriage. To the moment when your loved one was still by your side. To the…fill in the blank.

The psalmist, too, longed for the good ol’ days.

“My heart is breaking as I remember how it used to be: I walked among the crowds of worshippers leading a great procession to the house of God, singing for joy and giving thanks amid the sound of a great celebration!” Psalm 42:4

I’m sure you recall things you or your loved one used to do which aren’t possible anymore–or at least not done as easily. It’s difficult not to be disheartened when life seems to knock us down…or loosen our screws.

But if we keep reading in Psalm 42, we see how the unknown author (perhaps King David) responds to his personal weariness.

“Why am I discouraged ?
Why is my heart so sad?
I will put my hope in God!
I will praise Him again–
my Savior and my God!”

Author Chris Tiegreen says in his devotional Worship the King: “How you handle your pain says a lot about what you think of God. It indicates whether you trust Him or not, even in your deepest despair. It says that you may not understand your circumstances, but you know who governs them.”

“When life hurts, give it to God,” Tiegreen adds. “Trust Him with it. When you’re crushed, your faith honors Him in ways that your faith at other times cannot.”

This weekend we  literally turn our clocks back one hour as Daylight Savings Time ends (unless, of course, you’re really smart and live in Arizona or Hawaii). It’s a good time to remind ourselves to quit looking back on what was or what might have been. Instead, let’s look forward to our hope in a God who “encourages the discouraged.” (2 Corinthians 7:6)

P.S. Typing is pretty painful so if you don’t see a blog in two weeks, you’ll know why!
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Sep 25

Having some doubts?

Have the trials of life caused you to doubt God? Are you wondering why He hasn’t shown up in answer to your fervent prayers?

“Doubt rises up to obscure His presence and disillusionment settles into despair,” writes Dr. James Dobson in When God Doesn’t Make Sense. “The greatest frustration is knowing that (God) created the entire universe by simply speaking it into existence, and He has all the power and all understanding. He could rescue. He could heal. He could save. But why won’t He do it?”

Feeling abandoned by God is especially terrible to experience after you earlier felt a closeness with Him.

“Satan then drops by for a little visit and whispers ‘He is not there! You are alone!’” Dr. Dobson adds.

I can’t begin to explain why your loved one passed away or why your child has cancer or why you or your loved one have received such a dismal diagnosis. I agree with you that it doesn’t make sense, it doesn’t seem right, and it certainly doesn’t feel like God cares.

 

Back in the summer of 1990 my husband was leaving the hospital where I was recuperating from colon cancer surgery and the car in front of him had a bumper sticker which read: 

“Is He really?” my husband muttered to himself that day.

The possibility of burying another wife had shaken his faith to its core and Ralph actually wondered how he ever was going to preach again.

But as he prayed and studied that week for his next sermon, he came to the conclusion that despite life’s really tough situations, we all are deeply loved by our Heavenly Father. And the way we can know that for certain, my husband concluded, is because God proved it once and for all two-thousand years ago when He sent His only Son to die on the cross for your sins and for mine.

My husband finished what was one of his most stirring sermons ever, by declaring that even if God never answered another single prayer on our behalf, He already has done enough. When God raised Jesus to life, He defeated our greatest enemy: Death…and that is enough.

 

So go ahead and ask God all your questions. But remember, God is not required to defend His actions (or seeming inactions) to you and you may never know in this lifetime the reasons for the suffering which has touched your life.

He asks only one thing of you—to trust Him even when it doesn’t make sense.

My husband and the bumper sticker were right–Jesus is enough.

(Be sure to open in your browser to listen to the music video below.)

Sep 11

How is your tent holding up?

I distinctly remember the last time my family and I went tent camping…and why we never did again after that experience.

It was the summer of 1983 and my pastor-husband convinced me that it would be fun for our daughters and me to join him on the youth group camping trip. So I packed up everything required for the overnight stay at a nearby state park and we borrowed two small tents.

Did I mention that our girls were 5, 3 and 15 months?

Fortunately,  we got everyone to sleep–Ralph in one tent with our 3-year-old and me in the other with the baby and our oldest.  But it wasn’t long before I heard my husband calling out to me from his nearby tent: “Stay really still–there’s a mother skunk and four babies heading toward your tent.”

I cautiously turned toward the tent wall and sure enough, there was a mommy skunk silhouette and four smaller shadows toddling behind. I held my breath as the critters walked so close their sides pressed against the canvas. Luckily, the skunk family kept moving without leaving behind any of their special brand of perfume and I literally could exhale.

I thought the night’s excitement was over until a couple hours later a thunderstorm erupted and my husband’s tent starting leaking –waking up Bethany.  My tent fared better, but the three of us had to scoot in really tight so as not to touch the soggy canvas walls.

We survived the rest of the night undisturbed by weather or wildlife, but I vowed never to take three little kids tent camping again and I happily have kept that promise.

 

So how is your tent holding up? You know, that earthly dwelling we call our body.

“Unless you are in peak form and full of vigor, you have already experienced frustration with this earthly tent. If you haven’t yet, you will. It grows old and weary eventually, and then it dies,” writes author Chris Tiegreen.

I know many of you reading this are experiencing frustration with your earthly tent or your loved one’s.  Maybe the storm already has hit and you’re wondering whether your tent is going to hold up. And perhaps you even can feel some “skunks” pressing up against as you dread the stench of more bad news.

 And for some of you, the worst already has happened to someone you loved.  Less than 24 hours ago, I got the news that another dear friend had taken her last earthly breath, just four years after receiving a cancer diagnosis.

I don’t know how any of us can face the storms and stink of this life  without God’s great and precious promise: “For we know that if the earthly tent which is our house is torn down, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens.” 2 Corinthians 5:1

These tents are definitely temporary dwellings and that’s why they rip, get dumped on and wear out.  They are not our permanent residences.

“When hope in this life proves futile, when bodies ache and souls cry out, we can count on the glorious promise of resurrection,” Tiegreen adds. “There is an eternal house fitted just for us.”

I’m sure it will be the best Home ever and I doubt there will be any skunks!

Be sure to view this email in your browser to hear the music video below by Matt Redman, “One Day (When We All Get to Heaven.”

Aug 28

How could God let this happen?

When you believe in God, it can be hard to come to terms with the fact that He has allowed adversity to come into your life or your loved one’s. Author David Biebel talks about this fact in his book If God Is So Good, Why Do I Hurt So Bad?

Biebel says there are two truths suffering people have to reconcile:
1. Sometimes life is agony
2. Our loving God is in control

Think about it.

If God knows everything, this diagnosis did not surprise Him.

If God sees everything, He saw the bad news coming.

If God has power over everything, He could have stopped it.

But He didn’t.

He didn’t stop you or your loved one from getting cancer–or MS or Alzheimer’s or heart disease or whatever other affliction you’ve encountered. He didn’t stop it from happening to you or your loved one or tons of other people and their loved ones.

But the reality is that God’s Word never promises that He will stop all bad things from happening to us. On the contrary, it assures us that He is prepared for each crisis and will intervene on our behalf.

The Message Bible paraphrases 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 this way: “We’ve been surrounded and battered by troubles, but we’re not demoralized; we’re not sure what to do, but we know that God knows what to do; we’ve been spiritually terrorized. But God hasn’t left our side; we’ve been thrown down, but we haven’t broken.” 

God is in control.

Errant cells aren’t.

Toxic medicine isn’t.

White-coated doctors aren’t.

Herbs and vitamins aren’t.

We aren’t.

The sooner we learn this truth, the easier our struggle against serious or chronic illness will be. It’s actually quite freeing once you get it right. You can relax knowing Someone else is in charge—Someone much more intelligent, powerful and vigilant than we are or could ever hope to be.

Be encouraged that this health crisis has not taken God by surprise. He is in control and will equip you with whatever you need. And best of all, He will never leave your side.

Romans 8:38-39 has a powerful promise: “And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow–not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below–indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

As Kathy Broccoli reminds us in the song below “My life is in your hands. My heart is in your keeping. I’m never without hope–not when my future is with You.”