Category: attitude

Sep 30

A Messy Diaper and Sore Finger Road

When our  oldest daughter was six months old, we took her on a three-week car trip out West with my parents. She was a model passenger…well, almost.

I had just finished nursing Danielle while riding in the backseat on a lonesome stretch of desert. I was burping her on my lap before putting her back in her carseat when she let loose with more than her disposable diaper could contain. (Did I mention I was wearing white slacks because we were going to eat at the Officers’ Club when we reached our destination?)

My dad stopped on the first side road he saw, so that I could change Danielle (diaper and outfit), as well as wipe off my no-longer-white slacks. And that’s when he noticed the street sign: Sore Finger Road.

It seemed like such a funny name out in the middle of the desert that we all just started laughing. From then on, every messy diaper was judged by whether or not it was “Sore Finger Road” worthy.

Poop happens.

At predictable times, at inconvenient times, sometimes too many times, occasionally not enough times…but it happens.

As a 36-year colorectal cancer survivor, I’m probably a little more obsessed with this topic than most people. But I got the idea to blog about it when I heard songwriter-musician Tim Timmons https://www.timtimmonsmusic.com give his “Poop Happens” talk when we both spoke at a Bob Goff cancer survivor retreat in 2023.

Tim–now a 25-year survivor of stage 4, incurable cancer– described how manure actually is extremely beneficial.

It  softens compacted soil.
It improves crop yield.
It produces oxygen which helps soil breathe.
Adding manure to soil reduces runoff because it “holds together the good stuff and lets the bad stuff go,” as Tim explained.

If you’ve ever driven by farmland in the spring, you probably got a not-so-pleasant whiff of manure doing its job!

But poop doesn’t just happen literally. It happens figuratively too, doesn’t it?

Something occurs in our life–or the life of someone we care about–and it really stinks! As NY Times bestselling author Rick Warren puts it, “Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you’re just coming out of one, or you’re getting ready to go into another one.”

So true!  And if you’re like me, your first response is to want the “stink” gone…and fast!

Tim acknowledges that before cancer, he lived most of his life “trying to stop manure.”

“I was trying to keep my comfort…but now I ask: ‘What’s it revealing about the condition of my heart?'”

Since hearing Tim’s message, I’ve been trying to view the “manure” getting dumped on my life as a way God can soften my heart and help me hang on to the really important, good stuff.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.
 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.
—Romans 5:3-4

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.
For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.
–James 1:2-3

How about you, my friend…any “manure-dumping” going in your life? I pray you and I both can allow it to soften our hearts to the goodness of the Lord and in Him find our joy.
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Open in your browser to hear “This is the Day,” a very short, upbeat, encouraging song by Tim Timmons © 2021 Integrity Music . (It’s a perfect song to sing any day…even when “poop happens!”)

 

 

Sep 16

Seen any masterpieces lately?

Despite the fact my mother was a professional artist (and won many awards for her work), I still draw stick figures and will never take an art show prize.

My favorite (and funniest) memory of visiting an art museum with Mom and my girls happened in the summer of 1987 when Andrew Wyeth’s The Helga Pictures were exhibited at the National Gallery in Washington, D.C.

I knew the gallery wasn’t going to be that exciting for our girls, but was committed to keeping them occupied so Mom could enjoy these paintings–only recently revealed to the public, but already quite famous.

Danielle, 9, meandered in the small room, taking an interest in the paintings right away. Bethany, 7, perched on a bench covering her eyes so she couldn’t see any of the unclothed subjects. Meanwhile, the gallery security guard kept a very close watch on 5-year-old Lindsey as she marched right up to every painting which corresponded to a photo in the brochure I gave her and loudly announced: “Match!”

Lindsey really enjoyed herself and when she started kindergarten a couple of days later, insisted on taking the Helga brochure for Show-and-Tell. I was concerned that the teacher might think I put her up to this in an effort to impress, and suggested a favorite stuffed animal instead. But Lindsey was insistent.

Afterwards, she told us she showed her classmates the brochure, adding: “I just said ‘Andrew’ cuz  I didn’t want to say his last name.”

Wyeth’s exhibit is a sweet memory, but doesn’t compare to the thrill I’ve had in seeing some famous artistic masterpieces up close. Van Gogh’s Sunflowers at the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Vermeer’s The Milkmaid and Rembrandt’s Night Watch at Amsterdam’s Rijksmuseum. (And we had tickets to see DaVinci’s Mona Lisa at the Louvre before we had to cancel our 2023 Paris trip. )

Between my mom’s and my husband’s artistic talents, my home is filled with original art. My grandkids get art “lessons” from Grandpa and have shown some real talent.

I’m curious what masterpieces you have enjoyed seeing?

Did you know that you can see one every day as soon as you look in a mirror?

The Apostle Paul tells us in Ephesians 2:10 that “we are God’s masterpiece.”

The Amplified Bible says “we are His workmanship [His own master work, a work of art].” The New English Bible describes us as “His creative work” and The Voice Bible adds that “we are the product of His hand.”

I don’t know about you but when I see my reflection in a mirror, “masterpiece” is not the first thought that comes to mind, nor the second, nor the…

One of my hubby’s masterpieces!

But that’s how the Word of God describes me (and you!).

Musical artist and American Idol alum Danny Gokey (whose first wife died when he was only 28) wonderfully describes God’s masterpiece-making process even when our lives feel messy:

“Even though I’m hurtingI’ll let You keep workingYou’re making a masterpieceYou’re shaping the soul in meYou’re moving where I can’t seeAnd all I am is in Your hands”

Personally, I don’t feel like a masterpiece. I have many foibles and downright flaws. My faith is often weak and I easily can get discouraged.

But I do know the Bible is true no matter how I feel. So this non-artistic, almost 73-year-old must be a masterpiece…and so must you, my weary friend.

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Be sure to open in your browser to hear Danny Gokey’s song “Masterpiece” (less than 5 minutes). Masterpiece lyrics © G650 Music, Sony/atv Cross Keys Publishing, Thankful For This Music, Pure Note Music, Songs Of Universal Inc.

 

Jul 29

Slowing Down a Little or A Lot?

I’m definitely slowing down now that I’m in my eighth decade…no, that does not mean I’m in my 80s, but I will be turning 73 in a couple of months.

I’ve never been a fan of slow.

I walk fast (although I do stop to smell the roses, and lilacs, and peonies). I talk fast (but not as quickly as my oldest daughter, whose high school students remind her to please slow down). I think fast, which is good…and also gets me into trouble when I respond too quickly.

As a child, I recall my dad watching me tear holes in a piece of bread as I rapidly buttered it. “Faster, Lynn, faster!” he jokingly chided.

Speed usually is good if you’re a competitive person like I am. In grade school I won lots of races and in high school, being a quick thinker and a fast talker was essential on the debate team. And time was crucial in my career as a newspaper reporter on deadline.

Thankfully, God has delivered me from being so competitive–at least about myself. I’m OK if I don’t win, but now I’m one of those crazy sports fans (short for fanatics) cheering for my Buckeyes and Philly teams…(welcome King James!).

The speed issue with which I still struggle is a much deeper one and a devotional I read this week was spot on.

“We answer messages. We finish tasks. We take care of others. We keep things going because things need to get done. And then one day, we realize the body is tired, but our soul may be even more tired…Slowing down is not wasting time. Sometimes it is returning to what matters most.”
—French pastor Éric Célérier

I believe my soul is even more tired than my weary body.

That’s the bad news.

But there’s good news too.

Jesus cares about my tiredness and yours–some of it self-imposed by our own choices and some of it thrust upon us by others or outside forces.

Pastor Célérier https://about.me/eric.celerier writes that Jesus invites us to slow down as described in Mark 6:31:

Come with Me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.

“The rest Jesus gives is not only a break in your schedule. It is a deeper rest, the rest of the heart coming back close to Him,” Célérier adds.

For the last few years, every August I take a break from blogging and ministry correspondence for what I’ve called “a mini sabbatical.” So I won’t be posting again until September as I embrace the title of Célérier’s devotional: “This Summer, Let Your Soul Breathe.”

I’m not sure exactly what that looks like for me, but I’m looking forward to a deeper rest for my soul. Perhaps you want this as well. I know many of you have issues and responsibilities which weigh you down and can’t simply be ignored, but as Célérier explains, “Today, I encourage you to receive this invitation: Come away with Jesus. Even for a few minutes. Even if everything is not fixed. Even if your heart still feels crowded.”

And perhaps you’d like to pray this prayer:

“Lord Jesus, You see my weariness.
Helps me slow down without guilt.
Teach me to find rest close to You.”*

*From the YouVersion Bible App, the most downloaded and viewed Bible app in the world https://www.youversion.com/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Open in your browser to hear the incredibly peaceful 4-minute song, Slow Down, by Chuck Girard ©1975 Good News Records and Dunamis Music (ASCAP). I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Chuck in 1977 when he sang at Houghton (NY) College. A very humble guy.

Jun 17

Trying to Feel God’s Presence

Ever have days (weeks, months?) when you just can’t seem to feel God’s presence?

It’s not because you’re out robbing banks or tripping little old ladies. In fact, you’re not really doing anything “wrong,” and actually may be you’re doing the “right” things–praying, reading the Bible, worshipping with other believers. But the connection just isn’t there.

That was my dilemma recently. I kept going through the motions and even though I’m not a real touchy-feely person, what I really longed for was to feel God’s loving presence.

Reading more scripture didn’t change my mood, talking longer to God hadn’t helped my malaise, and singing louder didn’t do the trick.

I kept watching for something big to produce the close, connected feeling I missed.

And then out of nowhere, when I didn’t expect it…God answered.

I had switched my morning devotional book at least three times in recent weeks as I searched to find one that would “scratch the itch” in my soul. Finally, I went to my basement library and again looked through all my old devotionals. I pulled out a small hardback copy of ALL I NEED, which I had read probably a couple of decades ago.

I went back upstairs to my La-Z-Boy recliner and hot tea, book in hand. I turned to that day’s reading to see if it seemed like I might connect with its message.

It was entitled “HIS DAILY PRESENCE.” Nothing flashy, eye-opening or heart-stopping there, but it seemed relevant. I couldn’t remember when or how I had gotten this book so I turned to the front pages for a clue.

The simple inscription in beautiful penmanship, which I recognized right away was from my dear friend Carolyn Dunn, who passed away in November. I always called her my mentor, but had forgotten her words to me:

To Lynn, a sister mentor–Carolyn

The dam of unshed tears broke as I wept openly for my precious friend. I hadn’t said anything to anyone about how terribly I missed her and wished I could talk with her.

But God knew.  And His whispered message was loud and clear: I see your grief. I’ve heard your cries. I love you and gave this message today to remind you.

God-whisper. God-wink.  Godsend. People have all kinds of names for these divine “coincidences.”

Whatever the term, it reminds me of when the Jewish prophet Elijah was feeling overwhelmed, exhausted and ready to give up. He cried out to God and this is how the Almighty responded:

“And as Elijah stood there, the Lord passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper.
–1 Kings 19:11-12

As the song below says: “You whisper love when I feel lost, You whisper peace at any cost. No shout or sign, just quiet grace, Enough to hold me in this place. Your silence isn’t absence, Lord— It’s where Your deepest truths are stored. You speak in whispers, calm and true. And in the quiet… I hear You.”

Dear friend, if you are yearning to hear God’s voice: Keep on asking. Keep on seeking. Keep on knocking. He will answer…and it just might be a whisper.

P.S. As I was writing this blog, I realized it would post three days before what would have been Carolyn’s 82nd birthday. Another Godwink?
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Open in your browser to hear the short song “God Whispers” from Ambient Sounds.

Jun 03

Six Years and Counting: My Oncologist Has Cancer Final Blog #14

SIX…WHOLE…YEARS

That’s how long it’s been since Dr. Marc Hirsh, my dear friend, oncologist and former boss, was diagnosed with a rare, stage 4, incurable neuroendocrine tumor of thymic origin.

Neither the specialists nor Marc expected him to last six weeks, let alone six months…and certainly not six years.

On May 22, 2020, Marc went to the ER with severe chest pain and great difficulty breathing. Imaging showed a 12 cm tumor in the center of his chest had invaded his heart and collapsed one lung. The next day after seeing the reports, Marc instructed his employees to start closing his 31-year-old oncology practice. The next month he devised his own protocol of radiation/hormone therapy/oral chemo and began his healing journey.

Regular follow-ups have miraculously shown the tumor to be smaller (less than 6 cm) and stable.

Last month Marc turned 75 and this week he and Elizabeth celebrated their 46th wedding anniversary. In these past six years, they’ve welcomed two adopted granddaughters, traveled tens of thousands of miles in their RV, and allowed a new dog–a 90-pound golden retriever named Boondock–to steal their hearts.

“I feel like the past six years, in some ways, are the most enjoyable of my life,” Marc says. “I loved being an oncologist, but it was hard work and stressful being in solo practice.”

And while he misses his patients, Marc (an accomplished, multi-instrument musician with a great Bob Dylan voice) really enjoys the extra time he has to relearn classical music, as well as play old favorite Messianic Jewish worship melodies. He’s even taught his only grandson to play the saxophone and describes him as “quite talented.” And after not having enough lung power to play his own sax for the first few years after the diagnosis, Marc once again has picked up his “baby” alto saxophone.

“I still get short of breath and a little light-headed if I forget to stop playing soon enough,” he says with a laugh, “but I’m enjoying it again.

“I’m living like I don’t have cancer,” he adds. “Psychologically, I feel like I’m cured and just slowing down because I’m getting older.”

20th anniversary

When I asked Marc what he’s grateful for in these “extra” six years, he quickly answered: “Definitely more time with Elizabeth, our (two) children and (five) grandchildren…and having time to do things outside of medicine.”

In 2023 another challenge appeared as Elizabeth was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. Her left side is greatly affected and she needs Marc’s assistance with the tasks she no longer can perform by herself. Prescription medicine has helped with some of Elizabeth’s symptoms and she is managing to push through the unpleasant side effects.

At his 5-year “cancerversary” milestone, Marc told me: “I’m incredibly grateful to God that He allowed me to be here for Elizabeth after all she’s done for me.”

When I first blogged about Marc’s diagnosis, I never imagined I would give semi-annual updates for six years. Now that he is finished with check-ups at Hershey Medical and will be followed by local physicians instead, there won’t be any more “updates” from me. Think of it as “no news is good news.”

Marc describes his life-shattering diagnosis as now feeling like a “distant nightmare,” adding “I barely remember it and feel like I’ve totally moved beyond it.”

“I think the thing I’m really grateful about is that I just feel a lot more peaceful, much less anger and frustration with other people,” he explains. “I wouldn’t say I feel closer to God, but it’s more of a peaceful relationship.”

To which I say, thank You, Jesus, for six…whole…years.
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Please open in your browser to hear Rich Mullins, Marc and Elizabeth’s favorite Christian artist, sing “You’re My One Thing.” Songwriters: Rich Mullins © 1989 Edward Grant Inc.