Category: hope

Jul 15

The Love of God (and a Dog)

Life has been a struggle for my friend Trish since she was a little girl.

Shortly before her 6th birthday, she was diagnosed with Type 1 (juvenile) diabetes, drastically altering her childhood–especially as her parents didn’t cope well with the news.

So Trish learned to give herself daily insulin shots and always hide her tears because her mom’s family warned: ‘Don’t upset your mother!’

“My parents lost a daughter not long before I was born, and when I got diagnosed, they didn’t know how to handle it,” Trish explains.

Unfortunately, these early physical and emotional traumas were just the beginning. A cascade of struggles followed, beginning with a massive heart attack in her early 30s.

Rock bottom came soon after when her husband of 14 years left her and their young son.

“I felt like the earth was pulled out from underneath me,” she recalls. “I still loved him and I thought he loved me.”

A few years later as Trish tried to cope with cardiac issues and diabetes’ toll, she applied for a service dog, confident it was the Lord’s plan for her to have one–after all, she loved dogs and training them had once been a favorite job and pastime.

But the waiting lists were long and she never got a call.

Instead the ensuing years brought a litany of maladies, including a handful of mini-strokes; water on the brain requiring a shunt; damage to both retinas; neuropathy in her hands and feet; and small, benign brain tumors.

For three years, she and her son were in a homeless assistance program. Clinically depressed and with little resources, Trish started “self-injuring” as a coping mechanism for the pain and anger she felt.

Eventually, when she joined a Divorce Care group at an area church, the leader referred her to a clinical psychologist. As Trish met regularly for counseling, she was able to stop the self-cutting and the two women even became good friends.

“I didn’t have any big conversion–it was a gradual thing over many years ,” she explains. “I finally started  believing the Bible verse (Romans 8:28) that God will work all things together for good and all along the way He would give me little words of blessing.”

About three years ago–as she faced growing mobility issues– the biggest blessing came.

“I was listening to the song ‘Even If’ and I brought the idea of a service dog to the Lord again,” Trish says. “I was able to surrender it to Him–realizing even if He didn’t fulfill that desire, it would be okay.”

The very next day–many long years after she first applied–came the good news: A service animal was available. But the bad news arrived too: She needed $6,000.

Unable to work for several years, Trish had no way to get that kind of money.

So, as she explains,”God recruited a whole community” (including her psychologist) to donate on her behalf.

“I had no idea how many generous friends I have!”

A beautiful black lab named Adler came home with her in December 2023.

His service tasks include fetching a carton of juice from the fridge for Trish’s low blood sugar, bringing her sneakers and opening the front door so she can go outside in her motorized wheelchair. And if she needs something picked up off the floor, he’s especially helpful because bending over can easily cause her to fall.

Inside he loves to snuggle on her lap and outside he never leaves her side.

Nearing 60, Trish still faces a mountain of daily health issues, but emotionally and spiritually she has experienced an abundance of healing.

And the best part?

“The Lord showed His Agape (unconditional love) for me through Adler–that’s what my dog represents to me: God’s Agape.”
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Please open in your browser to hear Mercy Me sing”Even If,” the 2018 K-Love Fan Song of the Year, which also earned multiple GMA Dove Award nominations.

 

May 20

Do You or Someone You Know Need a Vacation From Illness?

Our extended family of 14 (seven adults and seven kids) always spends a fun-filled vacation week together and this year we’ll be heading back to a lakeside home in the Poconos Mountains (a.k.a. foothills). I think most of us are counting the days until we can relax, refresh, renew…and catch more fish with Grandpa!

Ever feel like you need a vacation from whatever health trial you and your family are facing?

You probably do (or you know someone who does)—at least a mental one, if not a physical respite as well.

Believe it or not the chemo room at Dr. Marc Hirsh’s office, where I worked as a patient advocate for nearly 20 years, became a mini-vacation from illness for patients when we threw elaborate parties for two days near Halloween.

One year it was a Sesame Street theme and I obliged as Miss Piggy. (For the record, I “porked up” with eight pairs of rolled up socks under my skirt and down my blouse!)

Another year we dressed up as Wizard of Oz characters with good and bad witches giving chemo. I covered my whole yellow-clad body with a long piece of yellow shelf paper.

“Follow the yellow brick road!” I announced in my best Munchkin voice as I led patients back to the treatment room.

You’ve probably heard of the non-profit organization Make-a-Wish which grants wishes for children facing a life-threatening illness—often a trip to Disney World or a chance to meet a famous athlete or movie star, but there also are programs for adults.  

If you search “free wish-granting for adult patients” a slew of them come up. This list will get you started on vacays for all kinds of serious illnesseshttps://cancercarenews.com/more-cancer-freebies/wishes/ But don’t make the mistake I did once by searching for “adult wishes” as that’s an entirely different category!

My friend Barb Titanish and her wonderful H.O.P.E. ministry, have created a beautiful farmhouse retreat in south-central Pennsylvania where folks can have a vacation from cancer. The 18-acre site has a beautiful farmhouse, a swimming pool, peaceful walking trails, a tranquility garden and a fire pit . Folks can come for three to five days. https://hopelifeline.org/application-for-haven/ 

“Whether you are just diagnosed, starting a new treatment or at the end of life, you need to give yourself a break,” says Barb. 

You also can create a mini-vacation from illness right in your own home. Declare every first Friday of the month to be “Cancer-Free Friday” where you only watch funny movies and no one is allowed to mention the “C” word. Or plan an outing for the day—a backroads ride with a picnic or an ice cream stop. Perhaps a mani-pedi and a tea room. Or maybe an afternoon hitting golf balls and eating BBQ.

Ask yourself, what would help your mind/body/spirit to take a vacation from whatever you’re facing? Pray about it and ask God how you or someone you know can make it happen. People cannot read your mind so let those who have asked to help you know what you really need. You deserve a break today…and I’m not thinking McDonald’s.

When they walk through the Valley of Weeping, it will become a place of refreshing springs.
The autumn rains will clothe it with blessings. Psalm 84:6

Adapted from Peace in the Face of Cancer ©2017 by Lynn Eib

P.S. I’d love for you to leave a comment about vacation plans you have for any kind of R&R this summer!)

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Open in your browser to hear Refresh Me by Leeland

Apr 08

Have you been bamboozled?

A few weeks ago I taught a Sunday School lesson for second- through sixth-graders which left most of the class gagging, spitting into napkins and begging for water.

My granddaughter tasting “wet dog!”

It was one of my all-time favorite lessons.

Lest you think I’ve totally lost my mind, here’s what happened.

I explained to the dozen kids gathered that I wanted to play a game which I was calling “Good Decision/Bad Decision.” Participation was entirely voluntary.

I think all of them were familiar with Bean Boozled jelly beans, but for any of you “uninformed,” there are two “flavors” for each color of jelly bean. You have to decide which one you will eat. A tan bean with brown spots could either be toasted marshmallow or stinkbug. A red and white one: pomegranate or old bandage. And an orange bean: peach or barf! 

I didn’t want any kids to actually “barf,” so I had napkins to spit out yucky beans, small cups with water to rinse out mouths, and delicious gumdrops to remove any lingering aftertaste.

I was surprised that every single student wanted to play and most wanted multiple turns! A few “good” decisions were made, but there were definitely plenty of “bad” too. (I ran out of napkins and most of my gumdrops. Here’s a 12-second video of some of the action https://youtu.be/P5mYYOFupgo )

Afterwards we talked about how to make good decisions and avoid bad ones, while recognizing that Bean Boozled candy didn’t actually give you any way to consistently make a good choice.

That lesson got me thinking about negative, life-altering events about which we don’t get a choice. Like when I was smacked by a colon cancer diagnosis in 1990 at age 36 when I was pretty much a health nut. I was perplexed and confounded this could happen to me and felt as if I had been fooled and cheated into thinking that living a healthy lifestyle would protect me. (By the way, all those italicized words are definitions of bamboozled!)

I got handed a stinkbug jelly bean instead of the toasted marshmallow one I expected.

How about you? Anything turning out in your life not the way you planned?  Perhaps something unfair or even unimaginable? Maybe a health diagnosis for you or a loved one which resembles “stinky socks” much more than “tutti-frutti?”

So much of the discouragement I’m feeling about this world right now stems from people’s decisions which adversely affect me and especially others I care about–leaving a “bad” taste in my mouth. So what can I do? Spit in a napkin? Drink water? Eat a gumdrop?

I wish it were that easy.

Instead, I remind myself that when life feels out-of-control, there is one thing I always can control: me.

“The longer I live, the more convinced I am that life is 10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we respond to it,” writes pastor-author Chuck Swindoll. “I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day-to-day basis is my choice of attitude.”

So these are the verses I’m trusting the Holy Spirit to use for my “attitude adjustment:”

Listen, open your ears, harness your desire to speak,
and don’t get worked up into a rage so easily, my brothers and sisters. James 1:19 The Voice Bible

Since God chose you to be the holy people He loves,
you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy,
kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Colossians 3:12

I agree with Pastor Swindoll that “When my attitudes are right, there’s no barrier too high, no valley too deep, no dream too extreme, no challenge too great for me.”

And I remind myself that as Mack Brock sings: “My God is still in control…You have not left me alone, though the world has let me down.”
(Open in your browser to hear.)

 

Feb 25

The Day Tim Timmons Left Me Speechless

L. to R. Tim, Bob, me, Taylor Hughes

In the summer of 2023, I had the incredible privilege of meeting and sharing the stage with a musician-cancer survivor of whom I had never heard: Tim Timmons. We both were speakers for a three-day cancer survivors’ retreat held at NYT bestselling author Bob Goff’s southern California conference center.

Personally, as a longtime colon cancer survivor, Tim had my full attention when he spoke about how “Poop Happens!” When he sang his debut number, Cast My Cares, I knew I had found a new musical prayer. And when he shared that he was a 20+-year survivor of a rare, incurable cancer, diagnosed at age 25 and now the father of four, my heart felt a special connection.

But it was when he told a true story that I absolutely fell apart.

Tim shared how he’d written and recorded a song he thought was “really good,” but his record label did not agree. Eventually, he and his best friend, Bart Millard (lead singer for MercyMe) rewrote and recorded it on the band’s label.

And then for the 35 of us cancer survivors in the room, Tim played and sang the song…Even If.

I stood to my feet, lifted my hands and sang my heart out. I had no idea Tim had the initial inspiration for my favorite song…the one with which I closed all my “Morning of Hope” seminars. The one that always leads me to bask in holy presence. And now God had allowed me to know the song’s story and meet its creator.

Scheduled to speak next, I went on stage, but was sobbing so hard I was speechless.

“I’m wrecked,” I whispered to Tim as he hugged me.

And why am I sharing this personal story today?

Because if you’re seeking a word to the weary for yourself or someone you love, I’m recommending you go meet Tim Timmons…at the movies!

Last week my husband and I saw the new release I Can Only Imagine 2, starring Milo Ventimiglia (This is Us, Gilmore Girls) as Tim. (It was my first time at the local Movie Tavern, where the plush seats fully recline and when you press a little button, a nice young man brings you food and drink. Who knew???)

Anyway, I went through two or three tissues and I could hear my husband sniffling next to me. Tears of sadness and joy. Goosebumps of God’s goodness. Infusions of faith.

We both were a whole lot less weary.

If you can’t get to the movie theater, Tim has other ways to encourage you, including his weekly podcast https://www.10000minutes.com/ which discusses practical ways to “realign our lives with the way and heart of Jesus.” (You also can sign up for uplifting text messages and view short videos to help feel God’s nearness. And find Tim’s music at https://www.timtimmonsmusic.com/ )

When Tim was diagnosed in 2001, doctors gave him five years to live. He turned 50 this month and next week is the release of his book, Waking Up Again: A Journey of Grief & Gratitude, co-authored with wife Hilary.

The authors say: “This is not a book about cancer. It is about how to embrace the gift of waking up each day, knowing the presence of Jesus in times of sorrow, and His faithfulness when the future feels fragile.”

Tim Timmons has been waking up on “borrowed” time for more than two decades. Every day he takes a black marker and makes an “X” on his right wrist, reminding himself that he’s been given the gift of another day.

I hope you’ll let his words/music/life “wreck” your weary heart with God’s love for you today.
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Open in your browser to hear Make it Well, the newest MercyMe song, co-written by  Bart Millard / Ethan Hulse / Tim Timmons https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLrF-ml7uks

Jan 28

Riding a “Blue Trail”

Christmas ’59

It was the fall of 1969 during my senior year of high school and my family was newly attending a small church in Apple Valley, California. One Sunday morning the four of us traipsed into the little sanctuary toward a partially filled row. My eighth-grade brother Jim tried to squirm past me to get to the row first. Like a typical, annoyed older sister, I insisted he sit by Dad like he always did.

After we were seated, I silently snickered as I, the cool, know-it-all teenager, sized-up the man on my left: cowboy boots; bolo tie; gold wristwatch with big red gems and a bear head. Looks like a real country hick.

I finally glanced at his face and whispered to my little brother, “Doesn’t this guy look like Roy Rogers if Roy Rogers was really old?”

My brother’s bony elbow jabbed my ribs as he loudly whispered back, “You stupid, that is Roy Rogers!”

I gulped, scooted my chair closer to our childhood idol, and when Roy offered to share his hymnal with me, I held a corner of it and sang my heart out with the King of Cowboys![1]

I hope you know the “Happy Trails” melody which signed off TV episodes of the Roy Rogers Show.[2] It’s a soothing, feel good song, which seems rather inappropriate for a word to the weary:

 “Happy trails to you, until we meet again. Happy trails to you, keep smilin’ until then.
Who cares about the clouds when we’re together? Just sing a song and bring the sunny weather.”

But listen to the song’s second verse:

“Some trails are happy ones,
Others are blue.”

Roy and Dale, married for 50 years, had plenty of “blue” trails—three prior, short, failed marriages for Dale beginning at age 14; the death in childbirth of Roy’s first wife; the death from mumps’ complications of toddler daughter Robin (with Down Syndrome); and the deaths of two of their adopted children—12-year-old Debbie in a bus accident; and son Sandy, who choked to death while serving in the U.S. Army. [3]

I can only imagine how many times this couple reminded themselves of the rest of that verse:

“It’s the way you ride the trail that counts.”

Faith and perseverance were the way Roy and Dale rode all those “blue” trails– the ones we know about…and all the ones the public never saw.

I don’t know if the couple ever saw this quote from Dutch Holocaust survivor Corrie Ten Boom, but I am certain they experienced her words:

Your trail might be blue, or grey…or even a coal-black pit, but I believe with all my heart that God’s love for you and your loved one always is deeper still.  When you “ride” life’s trails (or should I say TRIALS?) trusting in the Lord, He will shelter and protect your aching heart.

“His house is my shelter and secret retreat.
It is there I find peace in the midst of storm and turmoil.
Safety sits with me in the hiding place of God.
He will set me on a rock, high above the fray.” Psalm 27:5 The Voice Bible

Happy Trails–of shelter, peace and safety–to you, my friend…until we meet again.

+++++++++++Excerpted from Peace in the Face of Cancer ©Lynn Eib 2017++++++++++++++++++

[1] I laugh whenever I recall this incident because I’ve looked up Roy’s birthdate and know he was about to turn 58– obviously “really old” to my almost 16-year-old eyes!

[2] You can listen to the original version with Roy, Dale and Roy Rogers Jr. “Dusty” online at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgw_yprN_-w

{3] Together Roy and Dale raised nine biological/adopted children, including Dodie, who was in the church’s youth group with me, but we weren’t friends until FB. 🙂 She is Choctaw Native American and Roy had that same heritage on his mother’s side.

Open https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLfnDrK4eJs&list=RDqLfnDrK4eJs&start_radio=1 in your browser to hear “Psalm 27 (The Lord is My Light)”  ©2024 Getty Music Hymns and Songs (ASCAP), Getty Music Publishing (BMI), Jordan Kauflin Music (BMI), Laura’s Stories and Songs (ASCAP), Matt Merker Music (BMI) (all adm at CapitolCMGPublishing.com)