Category: trust

Feb 09

“Just let ’em fall like healing rain”

May I be honest and share two things?…First, this short post is mainly for me. And second, the song at the end is the best part of it.

I’m writing for myself because unwelcome events have left a trail of sadness in my heart.

Perhaps you can relate.

I’m mourning two years of a brutal pandemic, countless natural disasters, unending political bickering, and the painful fracturing of the body of Christ. Toss in my personal, unresolved pain issues; turmoil in our local church; dear friends with life-threatening diagnoses –plus other discouraging scenarios–and the result has become my recipe for sorrow.

Image by joseph_Berardi from Pixabay

I think I need a good cry.

I’m serious.

Sadness builds up in our lives and for the most part, we–men in particular–don’t allow ourselves to really feel the emotion. Instead we keep busy. We eat. We work. We complain. We watch TV. We scroll through Facebook. We even belittle ourselves for feeling/acting the way we do.

But we rarely shed tears. I’m talking about the cathartic kind of weeping where afterwards we feel strangely lighter–as if we’ve cast off something heavy. Which of course we really have.

It’s the kind of cry where we acknowledge we can’t fix all the mess in the world, in our country, in the church, in our friends, and in us. But we know and trust in a God who can. It’s a surrendering wail to our Heavenly Father who is at work restoring and renewing this world and us–even if we can’t always see it in everyday life.

So that’s all I’m writing for today because I want to take time to listen to the song “Tears” and do just what it says: “Let ’em fall like healing rain.”

Maybe you, my weary friend, will too.

“Let ’em fall right down your face; hit the ground in a pool of grace…Watch the old become new. Let the fear fade away. Feel His arms around you.”

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad?
I will put my hope in God!
I will praise Him again–my Savior and my God!
Psalm 42:11

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Be sure to open in your browser to hear the beautiful music video “Tears” by Matt Hammitt.

Jan 26

Swallowing Sunshine

So, this month is my 50th birthday! I know that surprises some of you who thought perhaps I was pushing 70.

Well, actually both are true…

Me at the beach December ’70

It was January 1972, my sophomore year of college at THE Ohio State University (some of you are cheering and others are booing—I love you all). My best friend Jackie and I lived in a one-bedroom apartment on the “bad” end of High Street. (Noisy bar outside, pesky cockroaches inside.)

Returning from Christmas break, I noticed  every night Jackie would lie in her bed reading the Bible. I found this rather irritating because it seemed as if she was “more religious” than me.  After all, I was raised in the church and believed in God!

So, I figured I would show her that I, too, was “holy.” I got out a little paperback New Testament my Grandma Burns had given me to take to college. Each night I opened it and out of the corner of my eye watched Jackie across the bedroom to make sure I read longer than she did. (What? Me competitive?)

One Tuesday, a friend of Jackie’s stopped by to give her info she’d requested about a Campus Crusade for Christ meeting.

Jackie with her dog Pokey in ’72

Jackie was eager to attend, but figured I wouldn’t be—probably the fact that I enjoyed arguing about the validity of the Bible was a good clue.

“You don’t want to go, right?” Jackie asked.

The honest answer would have been: “Absolutely not!” But once again my competitive nature asserted itself and I replied, “Of course, I want to go!”

The meeting that night began with students singing upbeat songs I’d never heard. They seemed excited and I remember thinking: They have something I don’t.

Later in the meeting, after dividing into smaller groups, a pretty blonde shared a blue booklet with me. At one point she asked: “Who’s on the throne of your life?”

As a newspaper reporter I loved to ask questions, but this seemed like a dumb one.

“I am—who else would be?” I responded.

The girl patiently explained that when we put Jesus on the throne of our life, everything changes as His Holy Spirit supernaturally provides the power to live a God-pleasing life. Then she asked me if I wanted to pray and surrender the leadership of my life to Him.

To this day, I’m still amazed that my 18-year-old, know-it-all self said “yes,” but I did. And she was right…everything changed. I experienced God’s peace, joy and purpose in an incredible way.

To quote E. Stanley Jones, “When I met Christ, I felt that I had swallowed sunshine.”(And now you know why I celebrate two birthdays: one a physical birth and one a spiritual rebirth. And why I’m forever grateful for my dear friend Jackie.)

Half a century later, I still feel Christ’s light in me. But honestly, I still sometimes get back on the throne. I want things my way and in my timing.

Have you swallowed sunshine, my friend? If so, I remind you–as I daily do myself–to keep Jesus on the throne no matter what weariness this world throws at us.

But set apart Christ as Lord in your hearts and always be ready to give an answer
to anyone who asks about the hope you possess. 1 Peter 3:15

P.S. If you ever want to talk about who’s on the throne in your life, email me at cancerhope4u@gmail.com
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Make sure to open in your browser to hear one of my favorite songs, “Jesus We Enthrone You” by Don Moen.

Dec 15

Grieving something or someone this Christmas?

I thought it wouldn’t.

But it did.

It happened again.

Kenny G was belting out jazzy, holiday cheer. A burning candle wafted a delicious candy cane scent. I was by myself happily decorating our house for Christmas. I lifted a slightly torn, rectangular box out of the large plastic storage bin and chuckled to myself. This box has to be more than 60 years old!

Carefully wrapped inside was a slender, shiny, tree topper that graced my parents’ Christmas trees for decades. It wasn’t the original which came in the now-yellowed box, but a replacement topper my folks decided to store there after the first one broke. (I can just hear my Mom saying: Why throw away a perfectly good box?)

I lovingly placed the topper in my mom’s antique glass pitcher filled with some of my parents’ old ornaments, stepped back and approvingly surveyed my decorating.

 And then it started. A lump in my throat. I swallowed hard, but it grew. I felt my eyes misting and then hot, tears began to sting as I tried to hold them back.

I miss my mom and my dad. I don’t want their ornaments…I want them! 

I sat down on the couch and wept.

And that’s what grief does to us. It catches us when we’re not expecting it and won’t let go until we’ve allowed it to have its say.

Have you experienced grief sneaking up on you? A sound, a smell, a word, a photo. Something triggers a memory or thought and you come undone.

Maybe you’re grieving the loss of health or a job. Maybe it’s the first Dec. 25 a certain smiling face won’t be in your home. Or maybe it’s been 20 years, but you still yearn for one more holiday with them.

Or maybe the persons you’re missing haven’t passed away, but circumstances are separating you this year. It just doesn’t seem right you won’t be together. That’s grief you’re feeling, too.

Connie Milchling, author, speaker, ministry director

My friend Connie, whose husband Brad literally dropped dead of a heart attack in 2004 at age 47 recalls that she didn’t feel like celebrating Christmas just three months after his passing.

“I felt horrible because I did not want to celebrate Jesus’ birth because of Brad’s death,” admitted Connie.

But a good friend gave her some insight which helped ease that holiday pain.

“Do you know what Jesus is doing this Christmas season?” the friend asked Connie.

Connie shook her head “no.”

“He’s weeping…He’s weeping with you.”

Connie said that mental image of Jesus shedding tears for her helped to stop the worrying about all the unwanted holiday celebrations. Instead, she prayed: “Just for today, I need to see Jesus. Just for today, I need to seek Jesus. Just for today, I need to serve Jesus.”

Are you grieving something or someone this Christmas? Jesus–the whole Reason for the Season–is weeping with you.  Remember He understands your sorrow (Isaiah 53:3) even if no one else on earth really does. Why not share in Connie’s prayer that today you will see Jesus…today you will seek Jesus…today you will serve Jesus.

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18
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Be sure to open in your browser to hear “Be Still My Soul” sung by Libera, a British acapella boys’ choir.

Dec 01

Don’t waste your cancer…or any other pain

Those are the words penned by author-pastor John Piper on the eve of his surgery for prostate cancer in 2006. My cancer prayer support group often discussed one of Piper’s ten ways we can “waste” cancer by allowing it—instead of God—to be foremost in our lives.*  

Probably the cancer survivor who most often expressed not wanting to waste his painful, unplanned circumstances is my friend Bert, diagnosed in 2003 with stage 4 prostate cancer at the age of 68.

Bert and wife Joan at our support group 2009

Bert’s cancer was not operable, so he underwent eight weeks of radiation and eighteen months of hormone shots to try and slow its course. The radiation went fairly well, but the shots, which “turned off” his male hormones gave him severe hot flashes.

“That gave me a greater appreciation of what women go through in menopause and I sure don’t want to go through childbirth!” Bert quipped to our group.

Because Bert’s father and grandfather both had faced cancer, he wasn’t shocked to get his diagnosis.

“I was surprised and concerned, but I had a peace about it,” he recalls. “I remember thinking that I could go home and feel sorry for myself—but I would still have cancer—or I could use it to show people that I’m not afraid to die. I’ve decided I will use cancer to share and encourage other people.”

Despite being told by doctors that he should expect the cancer to return,  eighteen years later at age 86, Bert continues to be in complete remission. A few years ago he moved to Florida where he still shines for the Lord–co-teaching a weekly Bible study, mentoring two men and providing lots of TLC for Joan, his wife of 62 years, who battles multiple health issues.

“I like to ask people ‘where is your hope?,’” he explains, “and I like to share with them that my hope is in following Christ.”

God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.
He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.
When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4:

John Piper, Chancellor of Bethlehem College & iSeminary

I cannot imagine how many people Bert has encouraged because he chose not to waste his cancer and refuses to allow anything but God to be foremost in his life.

But it’s not just cancer we can waste, is it?  It’s any pain–physical, emotional, mental or spiritual–that becomes our focus instead of God.

Piper says that “Christians are never anywhere by divine accident. There are reasons for why we wind up where we do. Consider what Jesus said about painful, unplanned circumstances: ‘They will lay their hands on you and persecute you, delivering you up to the synagogues and prisons, and you will be brought before kings and governors for my name’s sake. This will be your opportunity to bear witness.’ (Luke 21:12 -13). So it is with cancer. This will be an opportunity to bear witness. Christ is infinitely worthy. Here is a golden opportunity to show that he is worth more than life. Don’t waste it.”

Will you pray with me today?

Heavenly Father, I wish I didn’t have to face this struggle, but because I do, I’m asking You to help me not to waste it. Please take these painful, unplanned circumstances and turn them into an opportunity for me to show others that You are worth more than life itself. In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.

*(You can read his wonderful essay at https://www.desiringgod.org/books/dont-waste-your-cancer) 
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Be sure to open in your browser to hear Lauren Daigle’s beautiful rendition of “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus”

Nov 03

How God Whispers His Love

I’ve always been fascinated by the bald eagle, our country’s national symbol.  But about a decade ago these once-endangered creatures came to symbolize something even more special for me.

My women’s group was reading a book by husband-wife duo John and Stasi Eldredge in which they shared an amazing story.

While John was on a business trip in Oregon, he went to a deserted beach for alone time with God. Suddenly  a huge plume of water shot up and a massive humpback whale appeared right by the shore.

“Humpback Whale Diving” by ahisgett is licensed under CC BY 2.0

John said he knew immediately that this was a gift from God to his heart alone, a “gift from the Lover of his heart.”

Thrilled with John’s divine “gift,”  Stasi wished for one too. So while at a women’s retreat in California, she headed to the beach for time alone with God. Seated in the sand, she asked God to see a whale.

After a lengthy wait with no such sighting, she headed back to the retreat. Walking around a corner, she encountered a beautiful, solitary starfish in the sand and knew it was her special gift. Immediately, Stasi thanked God for His amazing love and rounded the next bend.

“Before me, behind me, surrounding me, were hundreds of starfish. Zillions of them,” she says. “God didn’t just love me. He LOOOOVED me!”

“Starfish” by Elena Kalis is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

As our study group discussed this story, some said they, too, hoped for a special reminder of God’s love. I didn’t mention it, but knew I wouldn’t be asking for any such “sign.” After all, I was a longtime Christ-follower who accepted the truth of God’s love for me described in His Word and didn’t need any “touchy-feely” stuff 🙂 (Can you guess where this story is headed?)

At the next meeting a couple women joyfully shared their answered prayers, including one who had a beautiful, double rainbow appear right in front of her car.

A few days later I just had started an early evening walk when my husband called out that he would go with me if I waited. Frankly, I really wanted to get going and hurry back to my to-do list. But I love my husband, so I waited.

As we headed down our big hill, I glanced up. Flying about 25 feet above was a bald eagle. I always had longed to see this majestic bird in the wild, but never mentioned my deep desire to anyone.

I began pointing and grinning while fighting back tears. I had walked/jogged that street day-after-day for many years and never seen this eagle who apparently fished at a nearby small lake. It was no coincidence that I saw it that day; instead it was a powerful reminder that the God who can read our minds delights in our joy.

As Stasi Eldredge writes: “He knows what takes your breath away, knows what makes your heart beat faster. We have missed many of his notes simply because we shut our hearts down in order to endure the pain of life.”

How about you, my friend? Has the pain of life pushed your heart closed to the joy of God’s love for you? I can’t promise you a whale, zillions of starfish, or even a bald eagle, but I agree with Stasi that “we must choose to open our heart again so that we might hear his whispers” of love.

Every time I see a bald eagle (including this one flying over my next-door neighbors recently), it thrills my heart and reminds me of my heavenly Father’s love.

Go ahead and ask Him to whisper His love to your heart today.

“And may you have the power to understand as all God’s people should,
how wide, how long, how high,  and how deep his love is.”
Ephesians 3:18

“I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love,
for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul.”
Psalm 31:7

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Be sure to open in your browser to hear the music video “How He Loves  Us” by the David Crowder Band.