Category: gratitude

Nov 07

Kudos to Caregivers!


In honor of November being National Family Caregivers Month, I’d like to offer some special encouragement to all the weary folks who faithfully attend to the needs of loved ones.

You’re physically tired. Probably emotionally exhausted. Maybe even running on spiritual fumes. Been there…done that. Way too many times. I’ve cared for relatives with dementia, others with cancer, COPD, and failing kidneys.

I spent several months last winter caring for my husband through his bilateral knee replacements, surgical hematoma evacuation and physical therapy. My caregiving turn should have been done for a while, right? Nope. Had to do it all over again this summer when one knee got infected, the prosthesis had to be removed and eventually replaced (after six weeks of immobilization and daily antibiotics administered via PICC line by guess who?) And it certainly didn’t help my caregiving stamina when less than 48 hours before my husband’s second surgery, I was diagnosed with Lyme disease. (I was feeling as if there was a bull’s eye on my back literally and figuratively!)

Did I mention that in the middle of caring for my husband, our 12-year-old cat, Ty, started losing weight and acting strange? I tried coaxing him to eat with all sorts of special treats and offered my best TLC for weeks, but it was cancer and we had to put him to sleep.

Still, I am a fortunate caregiver because all the sick folks I’ve cared for have been appreciative of my efforts and told me so.  (Even the cat purred right up until the end. 🙂 ) Maybe you’ve been thanked for your efforts, but some of you are caring for people who either can’t or won’t express gratitude for your sacrifices..and that makes it all the more difficult.

I’d like to share with you Jesus’ words in Matthew 25:31-40 because I believe they contain wonderful encouragement for caregivers.

“But when the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit upon his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered in his presence, and he will separate the people as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats.  He will place the sheep at his right hand and the goats at his left.

 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world.  For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’

 “Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink?  Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’

“And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’”

Imagine that. Jesus says that He sees all the “little” things we do for others and promises we will be rewarded for those good deeds. And even more amazing, He tells us that every time we perform one of these actions, we really are doing it for Him.

When you took time off work to go to the doctor with your loved one, you did it for Jesus.

When you spent all that time fixing food you hoped would nourish them, you did it for Jesus.

When you got up in the middle of the night to get their pain medicine, you did it for Jesus.

When you rubbed a back, cooled a brow, cleaned up a mess or sat through yet-another tedious test, you did it for Jesus.

Whether or not you got any thanks from your loved one here and now, Jesus saw your kindness and He will bless you for it. After all, you did it for Him.

To enjoy Scott Wesley Brown’s “The Language of Jesus is Love,” open in your browser or use this link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYucfd-5QUQ

 

Jul 04

Celebrating a Second Chance at Life Together

 

My husband and I celebrate two anniversaries every year–not because we married twice, but because God gave us a second chance at life together.

We have celebrated December 29 for the past 44 years as the day two starry-eyed twenty-somethings said “I do” without realizing, of course, what they really were going to have to do. All we knew for certain was that we were confident we could serve God better together than either of us could alone.

And for the past 28 years we have celebrated July 2 as the day two teary-eyed young parents said “please, God!” without realizing, of course whether or not their prayers would really be answered they way they hoped. All we knew for certain was the surgeon was confident he could remove the cancerous tumor that day.

And the next year as that summer date rolled around again, and I still was recovering from my difficult six months of weekly chemo, my mind started reliving the nightmare of the year before. Because I didn’t want the date to be a painful reminder, I told my husband  I wanted to celebrate July 2 as the first anniversary of God’s healing touch on me. We still didn’t know if I would live or die (odds were about 40-percent that I would make it), but we were confident it was a good thing the cancer had been found and the tumor removed. And I wanted to celebrate every extra A.C. (After Cancer) year we were given to share life together.

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My husband normally gives me flowers for this “cancer-versary,” but I was sure he wouldn’t remember this year and that was okay.  After all, he was in a nursing rehab hooked up to I.V. antibiotics in his picc line 4.5 hours a day and still popping Oxycodone for knee pain. He was scheduled to come home Monday, July 2 and that was the only present I needed.

But on Saturday there was my youngest daughter, who lives near us, walking toward me with a bouquet of fresh flowers and her outstretched iPhone on FaceTime. 

“These are from Dad!” she happily announced as I saw his smiling face through cyberspace.

“You remember what Monday is, don’t you?” he asked.

As if I ever could forget.

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If you, like me, have been given a second chance at life, you know just what I mean.  Maybe it was a physical healing or perhaps you survived an accident. Maybe it was your marriage that was repaired or your relationship with one of your kids or grandkids. Maybe you conquered an addiction or you surmounted an abusive childhood. Maybe you have persisted in spite of poverty or pain. Whatever God has brought you and your family through, you have a second chance.

Make up your own “anniversary” to celebrate coming through the hurt as you trust God for whatever kind of healing He has in store for you–body, mind or spirit. I can’t promise you 28 “extra” years like my husband and I have been given, but I am confident that God loves you deeply and will be faithful no matter how unfair life has been. Celebrate each “extra” year, month, week, and day. Life is a gift, so we all are really on “borrowed” time here on earth.

My heart is confident in you, O God; my heart is confident. No wonder I can sing your praises!–Psalm 57:7

As for me, I look to the Lord for help. I wait confidently for God to save me, and my God will certainly hear me.–Micah 7:7

They do not fear bad news; they confidently trust the Lord to care for them.–Psalm 112:7

Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.–Romans 12:12

If he music video doesn’t automatically load, try opening it in your browser or click on the link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3qGssYNdkU

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apr 11

Are you as contented as a 2-year-old?

A few years ago I was eating breakfast on the deck with my oldest grandchild, Bauer, 2½ at the time. Thanks
to my husband’s green thumb, the deck was bursting with beautiful blooms. As I stumbled around, chiding my foggy brain to wake up, little Bauer let out a small toddler sigh.

“It’s lovely out here,” he said with a sweet smile. “We have everything we need.”

Ah, contentment.

A bowl of multigrain Cheerios with milk, a Lightning McQueen sippy cup of O.J., the beauty of nature and a day with grandma—what more could you possibly need?

Maybe a clear PET scan? How about a drop in the tumor marker? No more medicine side-effects would be nice. An insurance company that didn’t balk at paying for what the doctor ordered would be really great.

It’s difficult to have childlike contentment when we live in a grown-up world where in the U.S. alone every 30 seconds a new cancer diagnosis is made and every 65 seconds someone develops Alzheimer’s. It’s never easy to find contentment while watching a loved one deal with a physical assault on his/her body—especially knowing we are helpless to stop it.

My dear friends Don and Jean, longtime members of the church my husband founded, know all too well how Image may contain: 2 people, including Jean Hessler Abbey, people smiling, people sitting and indoorit feels to have your world turn upside down and to frantically search for contentment again.

Both retired school teachers, Jean was diagnosed with inoperable, stage 4 non-small cell lung cancer at Christmas time 2013.

“I was shocked,” she recalls. “I thought I was too healthy to get cancer. I was doing all the ‘right’ things to be a healthy person—never smoking, eating right, exercising, weight control, regular checkups and all that.”

Since that shocking diagnosis, both Don and Jean have tried to live in the moment, but the admonition to “take one day at a time” is “the opposite of our teaching careers,” she says. “As teachers we always had to look ahead and plan for another day.”

“Learning to live one day at a time—and live it to the fullest—has been no easy task for me,” Don acknowledges. “My mind is always ‘planning’ the future, so I have had to change the way I think about tomorrow. I’m not there 100-percent, but I’m way better than I was.

“I think both of us in our own way just turned this whole thing over to God,” Don adds. “For me it’s putting total faith in His plan—knowing it’s a perfect plan—even if I don’t understand it all.”

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I’ve thought often about my grandson’s contented sentiment, especially mornings when I sit down with my to-do list ready to organize everything that I think needs to be done that day.  Sometimes I smile to myself and say “It’s a lovely day and I have everything I need.”

Perhaps that’s a sentiment with which you could start your day? The words of a toddler could be described as childish, but if like Don and Jean, you have faith in a loving God, they can become childlike trust.

Of one thing I am certain: my soul has become calm, quiet, and contented in You. 
Like a weaned child resting upon his mother, I am quiet.  Psalm 131:2 The Voice

 A soul that is calm, quiet and contented in God. 

What do you need today for your soul to be content? Ask your Heavenly Father and expect His answer.

 Know this: my God will also fill every need you have according to His glorious riches in Jesus the Anointed, our Liberating King. Philippians 4:19 The Voice Bible

…for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13 NLT

(If the music video doesn’t automatically load, click on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHe_qmo3gX4 )

 

 

 

 

Sep 27

Are You Tired of All the Bad News?

 

 

 

 

 

Our world could sure use some good news, couldn’t it? In many ways it’s a frightening time in which to be living—wars, rumors of wars, the constant threat of terrorism, violence on the streets, political unrest, stress in the workplace, and so many friends and relatives with cancer.

Life is not only hard; it’s downright unfair, as some people seem to have more than their share of trouble. You or your loved one might even be one of those people.

You may feel like the middle-aged man I overheard remark: “Every time I think I have my life together, something happens and it’s falling apart again!”

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we lived in a world where everything was fair and people didn’t get sick and sad things didn’t happen and nobody had to die? Who wouldn’t want to call such a place their “home?”

Did you ever wonder why there’s such a long in each of us for just such a place? It’s a longing for home, you know.  A longing for our real home. You see, we weren’t created to live in Pennsylvania or New York or Florida or anywhere else on the face of this planet. We were created for our real home—Heaven.

The Bible describes Heaven in Revelations 21:4 as a place where God “will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.”

And why won’t there be any more tears or death or sorrow or pain? Not because we’ll have all the money we ever wanted or all the fame or all the beauty or any other tangible item.

It’s because we’ll have God Himself.

In Revelation 21:3, the verse right before the one about no more tears, it says: “Look! God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them and they will be his people.”

That’s why there won’t be any more tears or pain or death. We’ll have what we always really needed to be whole—the constant presence of God Himself.

The great 17th-century philosopher and mathematician Blaise Pascal wrote that each of us has a “God-shaped vacuum” in us. There’s a hole, so to speak in our hearts that leaves us longing for something more than this world has to offer. It’s a hole and a longing that God put in us when He created us. He knows only He can fill that hole even though we try to fill it ourselves with all sorts of other things. Some of us try to fill it by buying “stuff” or with relationships or with work or sports or with learning or religious rituals. Some even try things like food or sex or drugs or alcohol. But none of these can fill the God-shaped vacuum in us…instead they only make it bigger.

The only thing that fills that hole and makes us whole is when God fills it with Himself by putting His very Spirit inside us, one life at a time. And when God’s Spirit lives inside us, we discover our purpose for living.

  It’s really quite simple. Do you know what it is?

We were created to praise God.

That’s right. We find true joy, true fulfillment, when we realize there’s Someone bigger than us. Someone greater than us. Someone worthy of every bit of praise we can give.

Our purpose in life is not about us. We were created to praise God with our lips…and our lives.

And when we do, a feeling of peace and power comes over us that reminds us this world is not our real home. If you’ve not really had praise for God well up in your heart lately (or ever!), I pray that you will today.

And if you’re still trying to fill that God-shaped vacuum with other things, I pray you’ll allow God’s to fill you with Himself and satisfy that longing for your real home. +++++++++++

(If the music video below doesn’t automatically load, please copy, paste and click this link to enjoy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbh43MGoigw )

Sep 20

Celebrating My 28th A.C. (After Cancer) Birthday!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s blog is a little unusual, but my birthday is Sunday and once you’ve had cancer (especially at the age of 36) you look at birthdays differently. You give up complaining about getting older and instead, realize that aging is a privilege you almost didn’t get. Every A.C. birthday is a wonderful chance to celebrate and thank God for the gift of life..

So…this is my last birthday before Medicare and I know all of my 1,047 FB friends and hundreds of blog subscribers are wondering “What should I get Lynn Eib for her birthday? I mean she already has EVERYTHING a woman could want: Dashing, debonair husband with two brand new knees. Gorgeous daughters who only make fun of her in months with 28 days. The world’s most wonderful grandchildren who allow her to constantly hug and kiss them until they are old enough to run.“

I mean what could you possibly get me that I don’t already have? A new hairdo not from the ‘60s? Typing lessons so I write books with more than four fingers? A cat who doesn’t puke all over the house?

These are all great suggestions and I plan on starting Go Fund Me pages for each, but they’re not really what I want for my birthday. What I want…and really need…are Amazon.com reviews for my new book Peace in the Face of Cancer.  I know…you’re disappointed that this gift won’t cost you anything. It’s irritating that you don’t have to drive somewhere and wait in line to purchase it. And I’m sure you are really bummed that it’s only going to take about five minutes of your time to give me this gift. I’m sorry, but this is what I really want.

Just like the Jelly-of-the-Month Club, a review is the gift that keeps on giving. It helps other readers decide to buy the book, which in turn improves the book’s sales rank, which increases its visibility on Amazon.com. Once I sell a lot more books, I can afford a new hairdresser. I can pay for typing lessons. And I’ll have enough money to hire a hit-man to take out my cat. (BTW that’s a joke, I love my puking cat.)

Oh, and more cancer patients and their caregivers will discover how to foster peace in their own homes and lives, as well as how to find God’s supernatural peace in their hearts and minds regardless of the medical prognosis. Hurting people will feel peace in the face of cancer.

And maybe, just maybe, in God’s grace, lost people will find Jesus. That’s what I really want for my birthday.

P.S. Here’s the link, and remember, in case you’re in the witness protection program, you don’t have to post under your real name!  https://www.amazon.com/Peace-Face-Cancer-Lynn-Eib/dp/1496417984/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1501528971&sr=1-1&keywords=Lynn+Eib

(I’m pretty sure most of the people in this music video are 84, not 64, but enjoy it anyway!)